Forgive my sap...

I know you guys won't indulge many more posts of this nature, but I am having such a case of the belated  baby dreamy-ness.  I really didn't expect to be so sentimental, and I really mocked most of my new mommy friends for all their sappy, mommy dreaminess. 

But I just watched Judah flip over, and with that flip went all my banal, cynical, mommy-judgy banter.  I melted.  Judah flipped over and over.  And I couldn't be prouder if he had won the Nobel Prize for Peace.  What the hell has happened to me? I am equating my five month old to world leaders?

The mommy gene has struck me and in a big bad way.  Yes, it is a bit of a delayed reaction and yes, for my childless friends, please feel free to laugh at me.  I did.  For all my parent friends, I really did laugh at you.  I admit it now. But I cannot help myself, I am a hot mess.  I love those boys more than words can express and even that is insufficient.  Judah is making all these wonderful ooohs, and ahhs right now and I couldn't be more puffed up, well actually, there is no equivalent for how puffed up I feel.

I guess what is most remarkable is the skepticism I felt about parenthood, even contemporaneously.   Sometimes I still feel so detached.  But right now the love I feel is so overwhelming that I don't have words for it and that is feat for those who know me.  These boys are the most amazing thing in the whole world.  And that is the best gift any parent can feel.   

I love them more than I knew love could contain.